I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
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