You're my little dorito
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
