We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
