So drunk, too bad you don't want this
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
