Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
