Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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