The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
