hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
