I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
