remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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