she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
nutella sex= disaster
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Randomize