She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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