thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i just had sex bonerless
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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