So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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