I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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