She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
do herpes really smell.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
