i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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