i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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