Don't you send me to vm
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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