I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
