i can't believe i had my finger in that
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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