ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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