On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
