His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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