That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
