No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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