ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Randomize