Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
