i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
