We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
