You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
We're using joints as your birthday candles
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
