i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
