Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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