She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
