Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I could fuck to npr.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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