At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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