For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
