I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
We have so much sex to catch up on
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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