Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
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