I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
literally had 100 drinks last night.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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