angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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