So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Randomize
