Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
And then he peed in my hair
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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