maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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