VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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