Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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