i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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