He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Randomize
