We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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