what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
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