love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Randomize
